why I constantly promote

I realize this blog has become almost 100% promotion of my youtube. This is for a few reasons. Some I won’t bother to go into that involve some jerks who don’t deserve the effort. But really, I just want people to see my videos.

I want to hit 100 subscribers. I want the short channel name. Ideally by my birthday on the 28th although that most likely won’t happen.


It isn’t a monetary thing.

It isn’t a fame thing.

I’m funny. I crack myself up. I love the content I make and I enjoy consuming it. I can’t be alone.

I want to spread this. I want to spread joy and laughter and reprieve from the daily dredge that life can be. I want to be a friend, a reprieve, someone you can go to and see when you want or need. Someone like all those youtubers who are there for me that I’ve never met.

I’m funny. I bet you think so too.

Plus I put a ton of effort and time into this. I love it and I just want people to be exposed to it too and hopefully enjoy the content as well.

So now I beg the internet, help me grow. I’m stuck as to what to do. Watch my videos, subscribe if you like them or to support, leave comments, and if nothing else, share my channel or my videos. Or even interact with me on social media.

Much love to all and happy father’s day to everyone out there and also love and support to those who have a hard time with this day.


feeling low

What two posts in one day??? Yep.

Ok I am not really in a great mental place and I thought I would just get it out there.

I am feeling defeated and it is really hard to feel the ups right now. Part of this is because I had a long day and part is because I am just way busier than I have time to handle. Also I lost a subscriber today and I get that people come and go but when you are a small channel (at least in my case) you feel EVERY ONE. Every single one that goes. And I get these messages from time to time of people saying I made them laugh and how great it is but I still feel the ebb. *sigh* At least I have the positives on this channel and I see a reason to keep going. I do really love it. I just wish I could get it to a larger audience and I fail miserably in knowing how to do that.

So the second channel, no one watches. Remember me being busy? Yeah, I don’t have Friday’s video filmed (or any later ones, or any of my main channel filmed or edited, so behind) and my videos are literally getting nothing. The first two had under 10 views each, all leaving in under a minute. So I don’t know if the audience is there. And now I wonder if it is sustainable and if I should keep going.

Maybe if I had more energy or more sleep or more time or less terrible of a day I would feel better.

Oh well.

Nothing to do but keep going I guess.

Maybe I will finally get around to adding my new pattern to my Etsy. It is an adorable derpy unicorn.

day 21 – drunk games

Today’s video is a new (maybe?) challenge that I came up with – drunk minute games in the style of Minute to Win It. Guess how well I did? Or rather go check it out and see… #withcaptions

Side note I am really faltering right now. I have stuff ready for most of the rest of the month but I have lost some subscribers and am feeling kinda down. Numbers aren’t the greatest and I think I am feeling this more today since my boss just “retired” and told us this whole story that makes no sense at all. She muttered when she left (she only gave us 2 hours notice that she was out) that it wasn’t true. I think she was let go and I don’t know how much time I have left. I was hoping to make my career more freelance if this one falls through but I am nowhere near there yet with youtube, etsy, and my fitness jobs. I am afraid I am going to lose everything.

But back to happy, check out the video. It is really funny this time, at least I think so. And if you want to support me, watch through to the ends of the videos (I do put a blooper at the end of each), like, comment, share, subscribe, watch the ads, etc. I am on almost all social media as amandatheg.

what I want out of life

I promised I would write more, and I am. I don’t want this blog to end up being just a string of posts promoting myself, but there will probably be some of that in here as well.

I finally decided what I want in life.

The odds are stacked against me.

But I know where I am aiming.

I have been really busy and thinking about what I want to drop so that I have enough time to complete what I want and to see people and not just work 24/7. I need to drop a job. But in order to do that, I need to make more at one or more of the other three to be able to live (yes, I work four jobs). And I was thinking about each of my jobs and why I do them and how I feel in general.

I want to control my own life.

I want to be the boss. I don’t want to work for a large company that refuses to promote me even though I am qualified and constantly passes me over and offers terrible benefits and no raises.

I want to be able to go where I want and work from wherever I am.

I want to have time.

I want to be able to travel and dance and see my friends and my nieces.

I want to leave my desk job.

I want to be able to grow my youtube channel to the point that it covers the amount that I make at my main job and hopefully a little more, and then leave my day job. I will continue to teach fitness classes and sell knit/crochet items because I really love doing that. Craft wise, I am the boss and I can dictate when I work and when things ship and what I have in stock or will make. Fitness wise, I don’t work that many hours and I can decide to not take on more even though right now I take on as much as I can. But with the day job gone, I will have much more time. And I really like being creative and having a community and doing the youtube thing.

How do I get from here to there?

I have 5 subscribers and a little over 100 views. I need much more to leave my job. Somewhere in the neighborhood of 250K views / video.

So I have to promote which I hate doing. I hate promoting myself because I am afraid of people not liking it or getting upset at my promoting. I don’t want to stand face to face with someone I know and hear them say I suck. I am much more ok with reading it online and distancing myself from it.

I also need others to promote. There is only so far one person can reach. I need people to like what I am doing and watch it, and watch the ads. I need them to subscribe (more subscribers and consistent activity on a channel will cause youtube to promote the channel as recommended more frequently) and like the videos and comment and share and add to playlists.

I need to boost all of my followers in all social media so that I have a further reach.

And I need a miracle.

Then later a new camera and a mic and lights and all that jazz.

I hate asking people to do this, but please check out the youtube and like, comment, subscribe, share, etc if you are so inclined. And please don’t skip the ads.

doing a thing

Yes, I am doing a thing. Or I did a thing, at least the first part, and then hit a major technical snag that I have spent hours trying to work through. But I will get through it and finish the thing!

I am being intentionally vague. I also posted in similar vagueness about this thing on my other blog.

To sum up – I am in the process of doing a thing, details to follow after tech support calls me back.